Gophers and Hoosiers and Cats (Oh my!)

losers.jpgI am defying all kinds of statistical probabilities this year. The line is supposed to make it a 50-50 proposition*. So just by randomly picking teams, I should be around .500. It’s not a large sample size, but it’s getting large enough.

I’m not close. I am 3-17, including an 0-fer my last 8. For what it’s worth, I don’t think I’ve gotten laid in the last couple of weeks either, so I’m failing in pretty much every aspect of my sinning life.

Although getting drunk? Still not a problem.

Anyway, my .150 winning percentage is beyond bad. And I watch a lot of college football. It’s not healthy. So you’d think I’d be better at this. Nope.

I’m giving up. I’m not quitting, just switching tactics. I’m going to be a monkey throwing his own poo at a computer screen and see what happens. I brought up a page with all the games and the lines, closed my eyes, put my finger to the screen and picked the team my finger landed on. And I’m just going to justify it after the fact.

And if that doesn’t work, I’m going buy a hooker and hope that turns everything around next week. Picks after the jump.



It’s never too early to talk college football. Never.

Even if the calendar say it’s barely summer, fall cannot get here fast enough. So over the next two weeks or so, Kermit the Blog will count down the 10 Easiest Schedules of the 2007 College Football season. We’re aiming for one a day (weekday), but we’re lazy, so it might take longer. Thankfully we’ve got time.


#7 (Tie) Minnesota, Northwestern, and Indiana

Boise State’s Statue of Liberty play—it only works once, don’t throw it away—will be the lasting image from the 2006 college football bowl season. That game out-awesomed awesomeness itself and was better than anything Charlie Kaufman could have scripted.

But running a distant second? The look on Glen Mason’s face after his Golden Gophers managed to blow a 31-point lead to Texas Tech in the Sponsor’s Name Here Bowl. I’ve got a 3-year-old niece. She regularly wears an expression that displays a better understanding of how the world is orchestrating the events around her than the one Mason had after his team’s overtime loss.

Well, the good news for whomever replaced Mason in Minnesota is that it is going to take a Manhattan Project-caliber effort to duplicate that size of implosion against a non-conference foe this year.